The Great Sex Guide? Shut Up!

I've recently received a copy of The Great Sex Guide by Anne Hooper as a joke Christmas present. And believe me, this book
is a bloody joke. In fact it's one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen brought to print.

Let's begin on page 135, and the arbitrarily named 'Nine Levels Of Orgasm' (in women) : 

"Each level of orgasm energises certain parts of the body and evokes certain observable and predictable responses in the woman."

Or roughly translated? Taoist twaddle masquerading as universal scientific truth.

And it gets worse.. : 

"Level Two (heart) : while kissing the man, she extends her tongue out to him."

What the..?! Every woman on the planet experiencing sensory pleasure
in the region of the heart will automatically stick her tongue out.

The End

Really?! I'm far from convinced. Does she have
reliable neuroscientific or anatomical evidence to support this claim?
If she does then none are cited.

There's not even any mention of the possibility of same sex relationships either. Who the hell is
this dinosaur of a woman? A blithering idiot, evidently.

That's ultimately why i dropped out of my Tantra class. All that
binary 'man this, woman that' nonsense was making me feel ill. And now
this stupid book is doing the same.

She continues...

"Level eight (muscles) : her muscles
completely relax. She bites even more and grabs frantically at his nipples."

It's comically absurd, isn't it? Try reading that grand
proclamation back in the voice of Alan Partridge. And you'll soon
realise that it's in a similar league of comedic genius.

The 'Great Sex Guide'? Don't make me laugh! (although you frequently do).