"The biggest sexual organ....is the mind.” - Christine Love

About you

You’re a handsome and charming man.  You could have any woman you want.  And with the latest Tinder technology, it's easier than ever to swipe your way to sexy time.

But the trouble with civilians is that they can be flaky, you can’t tell them what you really want and you can’t get rid of them if they get weird/annoying.  And they wear Ugg boots.  You may be better off with paid punani.   Find yourself a decent professional girl.  Filthy, but decent. 

About me

I am filthy, decent but I am also slightly fabulous and fairly gifted.  Although I am confident in my own skin, I sincerely get shy describing my attributes.  But it is customary.  So… I have been told I am ‘gorgeous’, ‘striking’, ‘cute’, and been compared to Audrey Hepburn, Monica Belluci and Catherine Zeta-Jones.  (blush)  I have also been described as ‘top shelf’, ‘posh totty’ and ‘f*@&!ing horny like Nigella Lawson’.  Apparently.

Whilst I have accepted that I am not simply a girl next door, even after years of being a purveyor of femininity, I still can’t take in (ahum) just how attracted men (and some feral women) are to me, and the impact I have on them.   But attractiveness is so much more than looks.  And it's refreshing to see that the kind gentlemen who took the time to write a review about our time together, remarked on my intelligence, kindness, generosity, dress sense, discretion, and clear communication.  Oh and they also said I am ‘reassuring’ and ‘reliable’ - which may not sound as sexy as a fountainous facial on a friday afternoon, but it is good to know you’re in safe hands when you are being led astray.

About us

Intimacy grows over time.    It is important that we have chemistry, built on mutual respect and understanding.  We both need to feel at ease, have fun, and leave each other wanting more.  When we are together, I do not ask prying questions and I never ask for ID.   I may ask for an Amazon gift card as a deposit to secure the appointment but I do not see, and do not wish to see, any of your personal information.  I care about your safety, your need for security, discretion and peace of mind.  I want the experience to be incredible and memorable.   My intention is to connect with you and feel your needs, needs you may have never spoken to anyone about before.  

You can tell me anything

The bare essentials